A Response to an Oklahoma Senator

Nex Benedict, whose family and friends said identified as nonbinary, died on February 8, a day after Nex was involved in a fight with others at Owasso High School in Owasso, Oklahoma.  The cause of Nex’s death has not been determined, and an investigation is ongoing.  Family and friends of Nex reported that she had experienced bullying from others.

There have been a variety of responses to Nex’s death and their identity as nonbinary.  This letter is in response to some comments made by State Senator Tom Woods.  The context and the comments are found in the letter.

Dear Senator Woods,

I am writing in response to your words Friday, February 23, at a Tahlequah Chamber of Commerce legislative briefing.   You were speaking in response to a question about the death of Nex Benedict and people who identify as LGBTQ+.

Here are your words as quoted in the Oklahoman.

“We are a religious state, and we are going to fight to keep that filth out of the state of Oklahoma,  because we are a Christian state—a moral state.  We want to lower taxes and for the people to live and work, and to go to the faith that they choose.  I support my constituency, and like I said, we’re a Christian state, and we’re tired of having that shoved down our throats at every turn.”

The context of your words suggests that you were speaking about people who identify as LGBTQ+.  What you want to fight and keep out of this state is attempts to advocate for their rights.

You strongly disagree and disapprove of their sexual identity and how they chose to present themselves to the world.  You have that right, and as a fellow citizen, I defend that right.  You consider their behavior to be sinful because it goes against your Christian beliefs.  You have that right, and as a fellow citizen, I defend that right.  You chose to describe those who have a different experience of their sexuality, as ‘filth.’  Again, you have a right to express your thoughts and beliefs.  But I disagree and challenge strongly that description.

You make a connection between this ‘filth’ and your Christian faith.  I am writing to you because I disagree strongly with your words.  And this may be the most important thing I say in this letter:  My disagreement with your words comes from my identity as a Christian, as a follower of Christ.  I believe your stance is antithetical to the life and teachings of Jesus.  

You did not call these people wrong.  You did not call them sinners.  You did not call them enemies of your faith or your way of life.  You called them ‘filth.’  I hear this word and consider its meaning.  Filth is something that is considered loathsome or foul.  Filth is something that can corrupt or defile.  So when you call someone filth, the meaning I give to that is that is how you see them.  They are loathsome and vile.  They are corrupt and defiled, and their presence can corrupt and defile you and others.

For me, filth is a word that is used for trash or refuse.  It is not a word that I would ever use for another person. 

Again, not because it is uncivil, but because it goes against the life, the teachings, and the spirit of Jesus and the God whom Jesus revealed to the world.

Your statement goes beyond just being a bad or inappropriate word to use.  It represents something about your mind and heart that is very different from my identity as a follower of Christ.  If I were to decide that someone is wrong, I would enter into discussion with them.  I would share my perspectives and create a space for them to share theirs.  If I were to decide that someone is a sinner, I would state clearly what I see in their behavior and attitude that makes me come to that conclusion, and I would be willing to hear how they understand their behavior and attitude.  If I were to decide that someone is an enemy of my faith and way of life, I would explore ways to love them.  This is what Jesus tells me to do.  This loving would not be mere tolerance, or out of love telling them how wrong they are.  This loving that leads to exploration would create a place for them in my life so I could know them.  Know them as fully as I can, even if I decide to disagree with them.

All of these actions are driven by my identity as a follower of Christ.  All I hear from you is that you want to get rid of certain groups of people, not disagree with them or even to interact with them in any way.  You want to get rid of them.  It is much easier to hold and maintain that stance when you see them as filth, not as individuals created and living in the image of God.

Finally, I disagree with your statement that Oklahoma is a “Christian state.”  Several years ago, I wrote a sermon entitled “Christian Is Not An Adjective.”  In it, I described how there is no such thing as Christian music; there is music sung by Christians that express their faith.  There really is no such thing as a Christian mechanic or a Christian counselor.  There are people in the state of Oklahoma who are Christian.  There are people in this state who are Muslim, and Buddhist, and spiritual but not religious, and atheists. 

As a Christian, part of living in a diverse society is learning how to live well with those who see the world differently.  For me, calling a certain way of looking at the world “filth” is not an expression of that living well.  For me, it is not an expression of the identity of a person who is a follower of Christ.

Thank you for listening, Senator Woods.  I thank you for your willingness to serve the people of Oklahoma.  I know it can be a challenging task.  I would welcome any response you would like to make to my words.  I would welcome the chance to dialogue with you. 

Respectfully,

Rev. Gary L. Hardwick, D.Min., LPC

Some final reflections. 

Having read my letter, I invite you to sit for a moment.  I invite you to go inside and be with the thoughts and feelings that were there as you read my letter.  I am asking you to do this because it was something I asked of myself. 

There was a part of me that wanted this letter to refute Senator Woods, to prove him wrong.  There was a part of me that was angry at him.  There was a part of me that wanted nothing to do with him.  I realized that all those different parts of me were not an expression of my identity as a follower of Christ.  And I did not want those parts of me to be a part of this letter.  With these reflections, I went back and edited what I wrote, deleting and adding.  It was only then that I sent it to Senator Woods.

This is important for all of us to do, because it is not about any one point of view ‘winning.’ 

It is about allowing all points of view to be present and to dialogue with one another.  But, often, we do put our thoughts and perspectives on the table.  We wonder if it will make a difference.  We can’t bring people with different perspectives to the table, but if they are not even aware of a different perspective, dialogue is not possible. 

I welcome your response.  I encourage you to share your thoughts and feelings in the comment section below, so everyone reading can participate in the discussion.